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Origins
When did I first know I was polyamarous? There’s a loaded question. Let’s start at the begining shall we? Like many little girls born in the 80s, I grew up on a steady diet of Disney fairytales and...
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Love and Limerence
Figuring out love and infatuation seems to have been something of an obsession for me, ever since those first stirings in my loins made me lust after other human beings. The last few months especially...
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Strangers and Surprises
I may have had an epiphany today in the way I’m approaching things. Well, several epiphanies perhaps. 1. There are three distinct types of relationships that can form right now: lovers in the moment,...
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Tied-up and Tantalised
I’ve always had a thing about knots. Learning to tie my shoelaces in school took forever- I had velcro till I was in grade 4 or 5. And I had a pink bag for my lunch that had a pull tie opening. I was...
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Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.
Polysaturation [noun] Describing the phenomena of a poly-identified individual with a full dating/relationship schedule, unable to fit in- logisitically, physically, or emotionally- any new intimate...
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Kickin’ it Kinky
At one point on my OkCupid profile I described myself as something like vanilla ice cream with white chocolate and raspberry swirls, aspiring to be drizzled in butterscotch and meringue pieces. I’ve...
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A Letter To My Mother
“When both of your parents are gone, no matter how much they meant to you, you realize they were only blocking the view.” ~The Far Side Of The Moon, Robert LePage I have a challenging relationship with...
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Depth and Desire
Two years ago, on the morning after my birthday, I woke up in a downtown Vancouver apartment, with a life changing epiphany. I lay naked in bed, gazing at the man slumbering beside me, his fluffy...
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Expanding and Exploring
“You have permission to ask for what you want.” Do you really know how to play? These words of relationship advice, from Marcia Baczynski, shifted my perspective about the relationships I was in at the...
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Gratitude and Growth
Just over two years ago, on a drunken stumble through the streets of East Vancouver with an ex, I was confronted with a question I didn’t know how to answer, and the quest for that answer changed the...
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In Limbo Lies the Love Languishing
“The ultimate state of love is freedom, absolute freedom, and any relationship that destroys freedom is not worthwhile. Love is a sacred art. To be in love is to be in a holy relationship.” ~ Osho...
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Tied-up and Tantalised
I’ve always had a thing about knots. Learning to tie my shoelaces in school took forever- I had velcro till I was in grade 4 or 5. And I had a pink bag for my lunch that had a pull tie opening. I was...
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Self Intimacy, Sex-Positivity, Shame, and the Resilient Edge of Resistence
“Boundaries are an essential part of life. They delineate and maintain needed borders and separations, making differentiation possible at every level. Boundaries both contain and preserve the...
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Strangers and Surprises
I may have had an epiphany today in the way I’m approaching things. Well, several epiphanies perhaps. 1. There are three distinct types of relationships that can form right now: lovers in the moment,...
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Radical Self Reliance and Community Responsibility
“The greatest damage done by neglect, trauma or emotional loss is not the immediate pain they inflict but the long-term distortions they induce….. All too often these ill-conditioned implicit beliefs...
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Tolerating Trauma
I am tolerating my trauma. As I sit down to write, anticipating the next session of the Good Girl Recovery Program, and reflecting on how my life has changed since I first took it three years ago, I...
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Keeping Up With The Joneses
I love Bridget Jones. If I had to pick three fictional characters I most closely resemble, she’s at the top of my list. For a chronically single 20-year-old at theatre school in London, Bridget Jones’s...
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Together Independently
“How do you explain to people that it is not true that you have a fiercely guarded heart? That it just feels like you have not had the space that felt safe enough to fully share it? To really let...
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Reclaiming Queerness
There is so much that I want to write about right now, and I don’t know where to focus. I want to write about the excitement I feel after a day of teaching about Consent Culture, and engaging in rich...
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Polyamory and Pride
This article is based on a public Facebook post I made, and adapted after much animated discussion, for which I am very grateful. You can check out the original post here. The tl;dr summary: Language...
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